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Tips
IT
Support!
With computers and IT an integral part of most companies
today, here are 15 ways of 'pleasing' your IT department!
1. When you
call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried
under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals,
dried flowers, trophies and children's art. We don't have
a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse
of yours.
2. Don't write
anything down. Ever. We can play back the error messages from
here.
3. When an
I.T. person says he's coming right over, go for coffee. That
way you won't be there when we need your password. It's nothing
for us to remember 700 screen saver passwords.
4. When you
call the help desk, state what you want, not what's keeping
you from getting it. We don't need to know that you can't
get into your mail because your computer won't power on at
all.
5. When I.T.
support sends you an E-Mail with high importance, delete it
at once. We're just testing.
6. When an
I.T. person is eating lunch at his desk, walk right in and
spill your guts right out. We exist only to serve.
7. Send urgent
email all in uppercase. The mail server picks it up and flags
it as a rush delivery.
8. When the
photocopier doesn't work, call computer support. There's electronics
in it.
9. When you're
getting a NO DIAL TONE message at home, call computer support.
We can fix your telephone line from here.
10. When you
have a dozen old computer screens to get rid of, call computer
support. We're collectors.
11. When something's
wrong with your home PC, dump it on an I.T. person's chair
with no name, no phone number and no description of the problem.
We love a puzzle.
12. When an
I.T. person tells you that computer screens don't have cartridges
in them, argue. We love a good argument.
13. When an
I.T. person tells you that he'll be there shortly, reply in
a scathing tone of voice: "And just how many weeks do
you mean by shortly?" That motivates us.
14. When the
printer won't print, re-send the job at least 20 times. Print
jobs frequently get sucked into black holes.
15. When the
printer still won't print after 20 tries, send the job to
all 68 printers in the company. One of them is bound to work.
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