Getting & Staying in Shape - A Case Study

"What we accomplish is not who we are. What we do is not who we are. It is who we become in the process of working towards the goal that is the real achievement."

At the time of year when many of us try to embrace a healthier lifestyle or at least shift a few pounds, a personal coaching client, Bronagh Wise, shares her story about how she resolved her lifelong weight issue and how she maintains her healthy lifestyle.

Bronagh’s story.

Overweight since her early teens, Bronagh, 38, had been on the diet rollercoaster for 20 years. She initially came to coaching to boost her self-confidence, but it became apparent that for her, weight and self image, were at the heart of the matter.

At the outset I asked her questions to elicit her attitude to food and dieting. Her responses included ‘diets are a chore’, ‘I deprive myself of pleasures when I diet’ and ‘diets don’t work anyway’. As Henry Ford said ‘whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you’re right.’ For Bronagh she didn’t believe she could lose weight. Until this limiting belief was shifted she would never attain and maintain her goals.

As with any goal and particularly with a goal that concerns self image, the ‘who you have to be to achieve your goal?’ is even more important than the ‘what you have to do to achieve your goal?’ Bronagh had spent years trying different ‘what’s’ from the Atkins Diet to Weight Watchers, but she had never explored the ‘who she was in relation to food, dieting and her self image.’ Prior to her coaching, the ‘who’ she was in relation to her goal of losing weight was ‘pessimistic, depressed and bored’ and that was the root of her problem.

When I worked we Bronagh, we did three things.

1. Instead of having the goal of ‘loosing weight’ (which is negatively worded and goals and resolutions must always be positively worded) we changed her goal to ‘to embracing a healthy lifestyle.’
2. Secondly, we explored who Bronagh needed to be to achieve her revised goal. She felt she needed to be ‘determined, motivated and proud.’ Proud was an interesting quality, but one of Bronagh’s motivations was thinking about the compliments she would receive from others when they began to notice changes in her.
3. Thirdly, I asked Bronagh to write out two paragraphs as to why she must absolutely achieve her goal of ‘embracing a healthy lifestyle’. The first paragraph was to focus on what her life would be like in the future if she didn’t achieve her goal and the second was what her life would be like when she did.

The contrast between the two paragraphs was enormous. Bronagh felt that if she didn’t achieve her goal of embracing a healthy lifestyle, she would be dead in 10 years and her quality of life over those ten years would be very poor. However the contrast with what her life would be like when she achieved her goal could not have been more different. She would be living the life she always dreamed of, married to a great husband and she would have loads of energy. She would have travelled to Australia, again a long standing ambition of hers, (but one she had put off as she was embarrassed by her size) and all her recurring health problems would be a thing of the past. Any time she felt low or was lacking in motivation, reviewing these paragraphs spurred her on.

By cutting out snacks and taking more exercise, (simply walking half way to work, rather than getting the bus in the first few weeks), Bronagh could begin to see progress and this spurred her on. There were a few occasions where she hit a rough patch, but we worked on how to get through these rather than giving up as she would have done in the past. She now viewed the obstacles as a challenge, a test for her that made her even more proud when she worked through them.

‘It was such a relief to know that I could still have the odd treat, I’m not depriving myself one bit. The eureka moment for me was when James said it was what I did 80% of the time that matter, I did not have to be perfect.’

We all know what we have to do to lose weight or live a healthier lifestyle. It is not rocket science. Eat more sensibly and exercise more regularly. You know it, but why don’t you do it? The answer lies in your beliefs and habits. Know that changing habits require conscious effort and for the first few weeks it will feel uncomfortable - but persevere. Focus on the end result.

All actions are preceded by thoughts. By paying attention to the ‘who we have to be’ - by being someone before we do something, we are fueling our motivation for our actions.

If you are interested in private coaching sessions contact James personally at 087 2492774 or send him an e-mail